Fear is a primal survival response: Even if we know we are safe, our bodies don’t always listen. Loss of control, uncertainty, restriction, the threat of pain can all trigger our fight, flight, or freeze response and flood the body with adrenaline, endorphins, and intensity.
What to expect
In this workshop, we will dive into fear and mind play as a consensual, intentional practice, one where power dynamics, psychological techniques, and bodily responses intertwine. We will explore how fear works neurologically as well as emotionally, why some fears are nearly universal, and how context, framing, and expectation can dramatically amplify or soften the experience.
Mind play is often misunderstood as just “manipulation”, but in BDSM it is negotiated and crafted in an ethical way. From subtle suggestions, laughter, and anticipation to double binds, impossible tasking, interrogation, and higher-order challenges like journaling, evaluation, or creative submission — mind play can affect the body without ever laying a hand on it.
Fear and mind play sit right at the edge of what is socially acceptable and part of the appeal is doing things we are usually told are wrong. We will look closer at what separates kinky techniques from the abusive dynamics of the vanilla world (gaslighting, restriction, or humiliation) and unpack how consent, intentional framing, and aftercare radically change their impact.
Content
- build fear and mind play scenarios intentionally and responsibly
- recognise triggers, limits, and when hot intensity turns into harm
- negotiate mind play without “spoiling the fun”
- use fear and uncertainty creatively, without even touching your partner
- design scenes that linger in the mind for long after they are over
Schedule
This is a four-hour workshop with breaks, suitable for curious beginners and experienced players alike. It invites all those who want to deepen their understanding and sharpen their awareness of the most powerful tool we have: the mind.
For Who
This workshop is for people who are drawn to fear and mind play and want to approach it with curiosity, self-reflection, and care for themselves and their partners.
Participants should be open to:
- Reflecting on their own boundaries, desires, and vulnerabilities
- Taking responsibility for the psychological impact of their play
- Adjusting or stopping when something starts to feel destabilising
- Learning how to build up intensity without relying on shock, coercion, or harm
While the workshop is trauma-aware and grounded in consent culture, it is not a therapeutic space. Participants are expected to take care of their own mental health needs and to engage with the material at a pace that feels sustainable for them.
Facilitation
Selina Morgan
Selina Morgan is a queer dominatrix, workshop leader, activist, performer, and producer of adult content.